Despite the fact that today is a national holiday I’m looking at it more as my “Get Back to Work” day. My intention to work billable hours last week was good but unrealized, even though I was able to severely cut my Facebook/game time. I intend to keep the same goals this week, however “N” has grown increasingly more demanding and fussy over the past few days, requiring more time with me and leaving me with only one arm/hand to work if I get even that.
Hours and hours were spent this morning and early this afternoon with a fussy baby, and although not billable, I realized I needed to spend time cleaning out my email inbox. Nearly a month of emails had gotten backed up in my inboxes (both on PC and laptop) and I NEEDED to clean it out and organize whatever’s left. When I started earlier this afternoon I had 1072 emails in my (laptop’s) inbox.
Sigh… Baby crying again. Will write more when I don’t have to do a one-handed peck.
It’s nearly 3:30pm and I am quite proud of my progress today. The kitchen is just about clean and the only laundry outstanding is that which is in the dryer and a basket of the boys clothes which they will put away when they get home from school. (At 7 and 10 years old, our boys are expected to perform certain chores in order to 1) Earn video game/TV time and 2) Earn allowance.) I’ve taken a shower – a feat for any mother of a newborn – and I’ve even started sorting the pile of mail I’ve been avoiding. Oh – and the hospital bag is finally unpacked even thought I thought I did that last week.
And my biggest accomplishment of the day? I’ve ignored Facebook since before 9am this morning, even though I spent most of 9am-12pm with a baby on the breast. Do I want to take a stab at my latest level of Candy Crushers? Yes! But I’m happy to see the progress around the house.
I’m not going to deny that being in a foul mood fueled my cleaning energy this morning. Hubby and I were amused during a conversation early in our relationship that we both clean when we’re angry. We’ve been together nearly three years and we have never fought, but in the wee hours of this morning I almost snapped on him. With a three a.m. feeding underway, he woke and asked me if I needed anything. Feeling as though “N” was using my breast as a pacifier, I asked “D” to get her pacifier from downstairs so we could all get back to sleep. Five minutes later he came back in an extremely bad mood. Dropping the f-bomb numerous times, he expressed his frustration with our cat and the fact that he has taken to stealing “N”‘s paci’s. For some reason, however, this frustration was aimed at me, which was greatly unappreciated.
“D” and I share custody of the boys with their father 50-50, and he has them every Wednesday and Thursday night. Because we work at home, the boys no longer go to before or after school care and the ex drops them off here every morning around 7:30. Despite the fact that “D” has asked me to get him up by 8am, this morning I chose not to. My frustration with being vented at left him undisturbed in bed until nearly 1pm, when I carried a basket of our clothes upstairs (another lash at him because I’m not supposed to be carrying anything heavier than the baby right now). In the end, however, we talked it out, “D” expressed his sincere appreciation for the work I do and have done this morning, and he apologized for venting his cat frustrations at me.
i can’t tell you how invaluable apologies are to me. Knowing when to admit our faults and mistakes and apologize for the latter is far more valuable than being perfect all the time.
Wow… I’m rambling…
To continue on with today’s goals, here’s the updated list:
No Candy Crushers between 9am and 9pm (5pm will be a breeze, I’m extending a bit)
Fold and put away last load of laundry
Finish cleaning kitchen
4+ hours of billable time to clients
Pick up lost stitches on R’s blanket
6+ rows knit on R’s blanket
Start tracking glasses of water drank – and drink more! (Important for breastfeeding)